It all started at breakfast.
After feeding everyone and doing my morning chores, I came inside and made myself my usual bowl of porridge and a large mug of tea. At last, my breakfast.
And today Monster joined me (and, yes, I abhor cats that sit on the kitchen table and no cat has ever been allowed to do this but Monster will not be told so I’ve given up).
However, there are Rules.
Like no sitting on my iPad – so that’s ignored.
And then there is the Rule about keeping off my breakfast. No stealing.
Words failed me when Monster did this! A new low.
So, we had words. I reminded Monster about the Rules and he retaliated by sulking and I felt awful. I didn’t enjoy my porridge or mug of tea at all. I wasn’t supposed to.
And, as you can see, I am the Master of my own shed too.
There was absolutely no way on God’s green earth I was parting with a Tunnocks teacake, though Monster did wangle a piece of shortbread out of me which he shared with Pepper.
In the end, bored of the constant scrounging and general getting in the way, I put Monster in his basket for a break. I have a very large felted sheep order so I had to get on.
Monster liked his basket, though it is always a bit of a snug fit.
He really needs a bigger basket and I don’t have one – this is one I brought back from Mum’s house when we cleared it out (so now I must go off to look at large old baskets on Ebay for the ruddy cat!) Anything for peace and quiet and my sanity.
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Look at the face: totally ignoring all admonitions- no downcast eyes, no pleading looks-nothing! We just had this discussion here. I said that at least dogs look contrite, sometimes they can even pull off watery, sorrow filled eyes. Dogs are such great actors; each would be up for Baftas, Oscars, etc.; however, cats are terrible! I can just see Laurence Olivier or John Gielgud begging their cats to ‘EMOTE!’ And they would get the same response,’ You are being so noisy & really breaking into my total self-absorption. Keep it down, please.’ It is a good thing that our expectations are not too high for cats.
When one is granted to joy of living with a cat, one takes on the job of Support Staff. My job has 2 bosses who know EXACTLY when breakfast and dinner are to be served and argue about when the bedtime biccies are served. Dainty Paws (she of the 2″ wide ones) is first to stare while Pirate Queen does her best Beverly Sills aria of “Starving Cats are unloved” at full volume. But the trade off of a warm purring fat beast is worth it.
Oh dear, there you go again, that poor little neglected and malnourished creature, doing everything he can to get a morsel of food to sustain what little is left of his failing strength ….
PS, Monster, believe me porridge is a bit of a disappointment, take my advice and go for the milk (or better, cream) before it get mixed up with those oats. And Tunnocks are well worth putting in a little extra effort to get hold of; get Pepper to create a diversion, bat the teacake to the floor and under the table and share the it with her, making sure you get the nice fluffy white bit in the middle.
I would let him do all those things. Maybe not the keyboard.
You know if you get a larger basket it will be ignored unless you make it clear that it’s not for Monster to sit in. Maybe declare it’s a basket for holding your stuff and fill it with things you don’t mind him sitting on?