I’m feeling a bit bleak at the moment.
It could be the winter weather, which is unrelenting.
Or, I still think of Storm, a lot.
Or, I am sitting here in wet clothes because I got everyone in early because of the Shetland weather and was soaked in the process. I can’t be arsed to change because I will have to go out later on in the evening to feed everyone and will get soaked again.
Whatever the reason, I am feeling very empty and sad and damp.
Even Gussie’s lovely smiley face doesn’t cheer me up (ok, maybe a little).
The sheep are a good distraction, however, mostly because I spend many of my daylight hours looking for them.
Yesterday, I found everyone in the furthest part of the huge field. Luckily I could incorporate a dog-walk in this search too.
Lambie was sitting on a heathery tussock.
I think he understands my mood.
I dunno, I am just not feeling Happy Christmassy, despite watching every Christmas film on tv. I think it a combination of my three aforementioned reasons. I am not great around Christmas time anyway. I know I always struggle then.
And I might have to go and find some dry clothes.
(sorry!)
No need to apologize because you are feeling the way so many people feel at holiday time for one reason or another. As I mentioned in a previous comment, losing our wonderful lab at the onset of the holidays has been tough. I’ll wake up & think, ‘Oh I need to give the ‘girls’ a popcorn party because they love it so!’ Then it dawns on me that our little Ruby is no longer with us, but Annie & I can have popcorn. Grieving at holiday time is real for so many. Thanks for sharing!
Grieving is difficult. I am on the verge of tears all the time. If anyone says anything nice, I well up. xx
Sister #2 and I are also not in the holiday spirit. Decorated a table top tree but putting up Little Miss Maine Coon’s stocking did me in. Take the time you need to grieve Storm. And do put on dry clothes, can’t have you getting sick.
Dear Francis, I know how you feel, really I do…..Christmas is a time when I seem to miss people the most.
I do understand , dear little Storm. I too struggle at Christmas, but we have the new year coming and Spring with primroses and bluebells and hopefully, lovely warm sunshine. X
Don’t apologize for how you feel….its just how you feel.
I visited with a friend on Wed. who’d lost a four legged family member and with life thrown in wasn’t feeling cheery either. I told her it was just great to see her lovely face and have a hot cuppa and a chat. This time of year certainly stirs things up. I haven’t gotten any decorating done and have a business in house and should have at least done the client area up but meeh…it will get done only to have to come down again.
Giant hugs from over the pond.
Beautiful pictures but do find some dry clothes – just had to do that myself and it definitely made me feel better. Well, that and standing by the fire. Holidays are hard.
Certainly no need to apologise, Frances. Despite your mood you’ve still managed to put together some photos to make us smile. The weather has been miserable and makes everything such hard work. I hope you did change into dry clothes. I have some waterproof trousers which I bought in an optomistic mood but they are just too small for me – they’re probably about a size 14. Shall I parcel them up and send them to you for a spare?
Sweet of you, but I am a hefty lass – Size 18-20 at best! Thank you though for the kind thought. It is appreciated.
Perhaps I will go and raid the Christmas chocolate.
Just finished transcribing April 1941 and my Great Great Aunt has it far worse – WW2 is abominable so I must stop whining. At least we dont have bombs overhead.
This is the coldest, darkest part of the year. Being cold, wet, and sad is a reasonable response. As is grieving. It’s okay.
Although, being warm and dry with a glass of Scotch and some dark chocolate couldn’t hurt…
Sending a virtual hug.
Christmas is hard for so many of us. By the time we are adults we have experienced so many losses, especially those we have loved and this certainly includes the four legged ones. There are so many expectations around the holiday that if we are not feeling the joy we think something is wrong with us. Be kind to yourself.
Whine all you need to, do whatever makes you feel better. Chocolate is good too. The other day I stood in the shower and screamed – it helped. This too will pass but it’s rough until it does. Of course our furry family understand! Just know that MANY of us care about you and what you’re going through. And thanks for posting even when you don’t feel like it.
You are certainly not alone in finding this time of year depressing. I was considering not bothering to decorate this year but forced myself to at least put a lighted wreath in a window. Did so mainly to avoid my neighbors’ inevitable inquisition.
On another note: the last picture made me think of Fivla and Vitamin’s ad with them in their sweaters. This photo hints at the wool’s origin which eventually makes its way to the ponies. The photos are kindred spirits in a way.
Frances, you don’t have to be sorry for feeling the way you do. You have a beautiful, sensitive heart and this is a time you just have to get through. I’m praying that you’ll soon be feeling better.
No-one can be Sally Sunshine all the time, and anyone who expects you to be cheerful and funny every day is not someone who has your best interests at heart.
Nobody can tell you how to navigate grief, or know exactly how you feel. I expect I am not the only one of your blog friends who wish they were near enough to do a round of feeds & welfare checks so you could have an afternoon to relax.
Will both the girls be able to get home for the holidays?
Yes, I wish I could help, but live far away. Maybe someday I could travel there, curry comb in hand.
Dear Frances, the sheep are lovely as always. Just know we all love you. Your blog is what I look forward to every morning with coffee. Grieve at your own pace. Maybe put on dry clothes.
Hi Frances, my computer has been having a wobble and I’ve only just found this post. I agree with the comments that it is OK to feel sad at times. Saying a prayer for you.